Wednesday, 7 March 2012

Mummy trauma!!!

Well, I have finally done it - I have stopped breastfeeding my little man! Anyone who knows me will know that I've been through a lot to manage to keep breastfeeding my little guy - from refusal to latch, to nipple shields, mastitis and bleeding nipples (caused through early appearance of teeth!).
But I managed it - with a lot of help and support. I'd always said I wanted to feed Baby J till he was 12 months old, and then that got extended to our arrival back at home after our trip out to hubby's ship. But then when it came to it, I discovered that I was more attached to the feeding than I realised. I loved that snuggly, cuddly, personal time between my little boy and me - and although I wanted him to move to the next stage and I want the additional freedom of not feeding him for when hubby goes back to sea, I also wanted the snuggles and closeness.
So yesterday I had a visit from the lovely nursery nurse who has helped me through all the trials and tribulations of parenthood and PND, and when we talked about it she made me realise that I was just delaying things. On a him, I decided that the previous feed had been particularly lovely and peaceful, and I didn't want to get too emotional and ruin a final feed, so decided not to feed him last night.
I was upset - but he was fine! He sipped at some cow's milk (he's not a fan!), cuddled for a bit, and then went into his cot with no more than the usual objections. And he slept really well. So I think I'm going to have to accept that my baby is growing up, and although he doesn't need me in this way anymore, he still needs me. And as we close one door, a whole range of new ones open. Exciting!!!


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